Remember that time I was done with the painkillers? Yeah, I don't either...
Today started out when I woke up to aching pain in my ankle. It's been a few weeks since pain woke me up. I took some Tylenol and tried to fall asleep again but it was too late, I was already awake. Then my dad came in and changed the dressing on my ankle and noticed my foot was more swollen than usual - which was odd, since I sleep with my foot elevated. We called the orthopedic surgeon and he decided he wanted to see me today. I took a nap and then we went to see the doctor. He said the swelling and pain is totally normal, and to expect more of that as I start putting more weight on my ankle. He said my incision looks fine, and it should close up within a week. He gave me more antibiotics just to be sure it heals up okay. He also gave me a prescription for more percocet. I asked him if I should really be on narcotics again, and he said he wants me to take the painkillers so that I can really work hard during physical therapy. I'm not excited about being on percocet again, but at least this time it will be a much smaller dose - I'll be taking 1-2 a day, instead of 12. I shouldn't have to worry about becoming dependent again. I'm wary of the drugs though, after having so much trouble with the withdrawal.
Physical therapy went well today. I was there early so I ended up having like a 90-minute session. We're getting closer to making my leg go straight...
The percussion ensemble concert was great. I was wishing I was up on stage during "Omphalo Centric Lecture". I can play that piece in my sleep. Watching it from the audience wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, though. I got to play that piece on the concert a couple years ago, so now it was someone else's turn. Hana did a nice job covering my part. It's a tough part and she didn't have much time to learn it, so I was glad to see her do so well. Catherine did a beautiful job on "Marimba Spiritual". It made me think of G - when I was in high school, G introduced our AP music theory class to the video of the performing group Blast!. We insisted on watching it every day after that. One of the pieces on the video was "Marimba Spiritual", which I immediately fell in love with - it's so aggressive and dramatic.
I had a little time after the concert to talk to a lot of my friends. I hadn't seen some of them since they visited me in the hospital. It was so nice to see everyone! I miss being "in the loop." Eric joked with me that I am no longer the gossip hub, but I guess he's right. The downside is that I don't see my friends on a daily basis anymore and in some cases don't really know what's going on in their lives. Yet another reason why I can't wait for next semester, and for things to be back to normal. If you're reading this, send me an email sometime and let me know what you're up to these days. :)
I hope this post makes sense. I'm in such a daze from the percocet. Hopefully it will help me sleep, anyway.
1 comment:
Response to last post...remember that you do not always have to be strong. It is okay to miss the things you used to do, to feel sad and angry and confused. Feeling all of that is just another aspect of the healing process itself. Be strong when you can, and in those times when your strength evades you, allow yourself to embrace the weaknesses and let others provide the strength for you.
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